Kungani ungashayi inja

Ngeshwa, kuze kube manje, abanikazi abaningi bayaqiniseka ukuthi ngaphandle kokushaya, ukukhulisa nokuqeqesha inja kuyinto engacabangeki. Lena enye yezinganekwane eziqine kakhulu neziyingozi, futhi sizolisusa ngokuphelele ithonya layo maduze. Noma kunjalo, abantu abaningi ngokwengeziwe (futhi lezi yizindaba ezinhle) bathambekele ekukholweni ukuthi izinja akufanele zishaywe. Kungani kungenakwenzeka ukushaya inja futhi kanjani, kulokhu, ukufeza ukuziphatha okufunayo kuyo?

Isithombe: Psychologytoday

Kungani ungakwazi ukushaya inja, ngisho "ingalimazi"? 

Kunezizathu eziningi zokuthi kungani ungashayi inja.

Okokuqala, ukushaya isidalwa esiphilayo, ukuphila kwaso kanye nenhlalakahle kuncike ngokuphelele kumuntu, kumane kuwunya.

Okwesibili, inja iziphatha "kubi" ngoba noma ifundiswe ukuziphatha okunjalo, ngaphandle kokuqaphela (futhi ngokuvamile kwakungumuntu oyishayayo), noma yadalwa ngokwemvelo ukuziphatha okunjalo (okungukuthi, iziphatha - yini isimanga! – njengenja) noma yakhuliswa ngumuntu (uma sikhuluma ngezici zohlobo umnikazi wayo angazange azicabangele lapho ethenga umdlwane), noma izidingo zawo eziyisisekelo azizange zaneliswe (okuyinto futhi “ukufaneleka. "umuntu). Ngakho-ke akulungile ukumshaya ngakho.

Okwesithathu, ukushaya inja akusebenzi nhlobo. Futhi ngingathanda ukuhlala kulokhu ngokuningiliziwe.

Isithombe: keepthetailwagging

Kungani abantu beshaya izinja futhi kuletha umphumela oyifunayo?

Kunezizathu ezine ezenza abantu bashaye izinja:

1. Indoda eshaya inja ithola ukukhululwa ngokomzwelo. Wafika ekhaya ngemva komsebenzi onzima wosuku, futhi waze wathola ukusolwa kubaphathi bakhe, futhi ekhaya - enye i-puddle noma izicathulo ezilumayo. Wayishaya inja - kwakubonakala sengathi ingcono. Inkinga iwukuthi isimo esinjalo siyisiqiniseko somuntu, okusho ukuthi uzoshaya inja ngokuphindaphindiwe. Ingabe izofundisa inja indlela yokuziphatha? Kuyangabaza kakhulu. Kodwa ukwesaba umnikazi futhi ungamethembi kuyofundisa.
2. Umuntu uzama ukumisa ukuziphatha kwenja okungafuneki ngokubhaxabula. Isibonelo, inja yazama ukweba ucezu lwesoseji etafuleni - indoda yalishaya, inja yalahla isoseji futhi yabaleka. Inja ikhonkotha - indoda yamshaya, yathula. Ingabe umphumela usuzuziwe? Kubukeka sengathi ukuziphatha kumile. Kodwa empeleni, cha. Iqiniso liwukuthi ukushaya akuphazamisi ugqozi lwenja nganoma iyiphi indlelafuthi isidingo sakhe sihlala singaneliseki. Lokhu kusho ukuthi inja izobheka ezinye izindlela - hhayi iqiniso lokuthi uzoyithanda kakhulu. Mhlawumbe inja ngeke isantshontsha etafuleni phambi komnikazi wayo - kodwa yini ezoyivimba ekwenzeni lokhu lapho ifulathela noma ikwelinye igumbi? Uma inja ikhonkotha ngenxa yokucasuka ngokweqile, ukushaywa ngeke kumenze athule, okusho ukuthi uzobhodla ngokuphindaphindiwe, noma ukucasuka ngokweqile kuzophumela kwezinye izinkinga zokuziphatha. Ngaphandle kwalokho, ukushaya umuntu akuyifundisi inja enye indlela yokuziphathaukuthi isidingo singaneliswa ngendlela eyamukelekayo. 
3. Umnikazi akazi ukuthi kungenzeka ukuxhumana nenja ngendlela ehlukile. Uma sikhuluma iqiniso, kule minyaka yethu yamakhono olwazi, lokhu kuthathwa ngokuthi "izaba" ezihlekisayo, akukho okunye. Nasi isikhathi sokukhumbula isisho esithi "Ubani ofuna - ofuna amathuba, ongafuni - izizathu." Futhi manje kunamathuba angaphezu kokwanele.
4. Umnikazi uthanda ukushaya inja. Maye, lokhu akuyona into engavamile - umzamo wokuziqinisekisa ngokubaluleka kwakho nokuba namandla onke, ukulimaza omunye umuntu ophilayo, noma ukuthambekela okwanelisayo okudabukisayo. Kodwa akukho ukuphawula lapha. Okuwukuphela kwendlela eyamukelekayo yokubhekana nalokhu iwukuba ngemithetho evamile, esebenzayo yokuvikela izilwane, ukuhlonza abantu abanjalo nokwenqabela ukufuywa kwezinja. Esikhaleni se-post-Soviet, okwamanje, lokhu, ngeshwa, kuyi-utopia.

Okokugcina, ukushaya izinja kuyingozi nje. Ngokwemiphumela yocwaningo, okungenani u-25% wezinja ziphendula ngokushesha ekuhlukunyezweni komnikazi ngobudlova. Ezinye izinja ziqale zikhombise izimpawu zokuzithoba abanikazi abaningi abavele bangaziboni, okusho ukuthi inja ayinayo enye indlela ngaphandle kokuzivikela, futhi ngenxa yalokho sithola inja eyingozi kumnikazi nakwabanye. Kwezinye izinja, izindlela ezinjalo zakha ukungakwazi ukuzisiza, ngezinye izikhathi ezifanelana nabanikazi, kodwa kulokhu, inja ihlale ibhekana nokucindezeleka, okuthinta impilo nenhlalakahle yayo.

Isithombe: pixabay

Ingabe ikhona enye indlela? Yini okufanele uyenze uma ungakwazi ukushaya inja?

Ukushaywa kwezinja kuyifa lezindlela zemfundo ezinonya ezazivamile (futhi zamenyezelwa njengezodwa ezingenzeka) ekuqaleni naphakathi kwekhulu leminyaka elidlule. Lezi zindlela zaziwumphumela oqondile wokuphatha izinja njengemishini yempi, okufanele ibonise ukulalela okungangabazeki kanye nokuntuleka okuphelele kwesinyathelo esivela esigabeni "Isinyathelo kwesokunxele, sinyathelo kwesokudla - ukubulawa ngaso leso sikhathi." Futhi futhi umphumela wezinga eliphansi kakhulu lokuqonda i-psychology yenja kanye nezici zokuziphatha kwayo.

Kodwa-ke, ukuziphatha kwezinja manje kufundwa kuwo wonke ama-engeli, futhi emashumini ambalwa eminyaka adlule sifunde okwengeziwe “ngabahlobo abakhulu” kunaseminyakeni eyinkulungwane edlule. Ngakho-ke ziningi ezinye izindlela zokuqeqesha ezinonya, futhi ukushaya inja kuwukuzikhethela ngokuphelele. Ukuzisusa kuwubuwula nje futhi kuwukungathembeki ezilwaneni ezifuywayo.

Akekho ophikisana neqiniso lokuthi kubalulekile ukufundisa inja imithetho. Kodwa kuwufanele ukukwenza ngokuhlakanipha. Ukuvumelana nokuvumelana, ukubikezela kanye nokwehlukahlukana ngezilinganiso ezifanele, kanye nokuhlinzeka ngezidingo eziyisisekelo zomngane onemilenze emine kubaluleke kakhulu.

Kunezinhlobonhlobo eziningi zezindlela zokuqeqesha izinja nokuguqulwa kokuziphatha ezingenalo unya futhi ezisekelwe ekuqiniseni okuhle.

Zifunde futhi ufundise inja, futhi kulokhu, ukukhulumisana naye iminyaka eminingi kuzokulethela injabulo, hhayi ukugqitshwa unya olungenangqondo.

Ungase ube nesithakazelo ku:  Ukukhonkotha kwenja okweqile: izindlela zokulungisa